Don't Get Your Computer Wet! On rules: Everything is related to sex. The rules are always related to sex, against sex. Rules about movies, rules about society, the law, the side-saddle. They're trying to keep life in check and control nature. Control the female. It goes back to the rib. Too much emotion and too much power. On alligators: They're born to survive. I love how they're scary. On her marriage "performance": It's a marriage scene that leads into a human sacrifice and some homoerotic stuff. Who's getting sacrificed? Me, usually. Who's getting homoerotic? The gays. On the book she's reading: He ends up killing his mother and raping his sister on a pile of corpses. On that girl who got inside the horse: It'd be kind of cool if someone wore you after you died. On New York: I got my wallet stolen then I got molested on the train -- everyone looked away. Then this cheerleader came up and gave me a hug. On David Bowie: I didn't like boys -- only David Bowie. I had a Labyrinth party. The theme was a drinking game, I didn't know what that meant. I just found it online. No parents let their kids come so only one girl showed up who didn't even know it was a party. The game was you take a shot -- of water -- every time Sarah says crystal ball. The loser was the one who had to pee first. On British strippers: Strippers in London -- not so great. They wear these strange fake gowns and then go to back rooms and just take them off. People don't tip cause they have pounds. So you only get paid for lap dances. There are some clubs where the girls have pint glasses. It's like alms for the poor. On her first masturbation: First time I masturbated was to David Bowie in Labyrinth. On puberty and excitement: I think there's a weird line where you're supposed to become an adult and you don't want it. I felt the most sexual when I was a child. All I thought of was touching and seeing peoples' bodies. Not in a gross way. I used to climb up a tree and let the dogs attack me. We'd get the Dobermans excited then run to the jacaranda tree before they bit us. On homosexuality: Homosexuality has always been there. Why does it have to be so singular? The media doesn't know how to represent love or homosexuality. I have never had a gay friend that acted like any gay character on TV. Gays are really important in a relationship. Having gay friends makes a straight couple closer. Gay men can love a woman but they can't get a hard on. It's a different kind of love. Pure and interesting, and male. I've blushed with my gay friends. I'm not a fag hag. But we feel something special, something that almost makes us feel like we're going against our true selves. On having sex: When I'm having sex with someone it's totally different then when I'm hanging out with them. I don't feel like it's the same person. I'm thinking that I'm having sex -- it's everything. I'm not thinking about anyone. It's just that. When people say it's love they're associating happiness with love -- people should feel love but when they say 'love love love' they're not understanding what it means. On Oscar Wilde: Oscar Wilde loved his wife. On dangerous affairs: I've been the rebound. I've been the other woman -- I didn't even know until there was this crazy girl running after me. I accidentally put someone in the hospital while making out. I jokingly threw this guy off me and he landed on a shot glass and cut the main thumb vein open. There was blood everywhere. We went to the emergency room. He had his arm in a sling that made him have a thumbs up for 3 months. On old ideas: Never go back. (interview by Drew Denny)